Your Daily Dracula – Wolf Morrison, Vampire City (2009)
This subtitled ‘Part 1 – Rock ‘n’ Roll Vampires From Hell’. There is actually a Part 2 – Rock ‘n’ Roll Vampires From Outer Space’ (though the end credits of this one promise it’ll be ‘The Revenge of the Vampire Queen’). Made in Austria by writer-director-star-co-star-editor-composer-casting director Wolf Morrison, it’s a blurry video effort which opens with some half-hearted action featuring Viennese wrestlers and a goth-punk vampire thug called Morlock (Christian Gassler) but then plays down the horror-action stuff and is mostly a weird comic buddy/romance movie in which Morrison plays both Robert Van Helsing, in town at the behest of the talking skeleton of his dead father to get revenge, and Count Dracula, a nice guy in a hooded cloak who just wants to play rock ‘n’ roll (though the self-penned songs he croons and strums fit more into the ‘easy listening’ category).
Both Morrisons get girlfriends – Sofia Soul, Franziska Doppel – and there’s a vampire queen (Biggie Waite) and a Princess (Christina Breit) in the mix. Sharp-nosed Morrison is a genial presence and I was almost charmed by the blatant effects-avoidance of cutting from one-shot to one-shot as Van Helsing and Dracula talk to each other. Dracula has pancake make-up and only very rarely fangs and there is kind of an explanation of why he looks like Van Helsing, though I’m not sure I was paying attention by that point in the film. It has a ton of non sequitur stuff, some of which almost wrung a smile out of me – a performance by Arnold Schwarzenegger’s disembodied brain, vampires shunning not the crucifix but DVDs of Countess Dracula’s Orgy of Blood and Killer Barbys vs Dracula or a CD of the Spice Girls (on the grounds that garlic is sort of like a spice). Those 10/10 user reviews on IMDb are a bit sus.
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